My Date with Drew

Okay…so it’s not my date with Drew but I can say I was living vicariously through him. Some random guy going nowhere in LA won $1,100 in a pilot game show. Instead of spending it on bills because he’s broke, he spent it filming a documentary of his quest. No, it’s not as epic as Frodo’s trip to Mt. Doom in Mordor. But it does have perkier benefits.

I’m watching this really nice guy, who I now title as a “loser” out of sheer jealousy, actually take steps and successfully get a date with Drew Barrymore. This is one of those moments where you keep murmering to yourself “Why him? I’m much more suave than this shmuck. Why did I say shmuck? Did I say it because he’s Jewish? Oh god! Am I a closet racist? Is that why I’m laughing at his jew fro?!? I’M A TERRIBLE PERSON! ….eh, I’m still better looking. I hope you choke on a Heimlich Maneuver pamphlet.”

Inner monologues aside, a serious congratulations to this guy. Keeping living the dream. And might I add, an excellent choice on a celebrity crush. I’ve heard some friends strongly disagree with my crush on Drew. But fortunate for me I’m smarter and better looking than those Fabio wannabes. I’ll gladly take a Drew Barrymore over a Megan Fox any day of the week.


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